if you're feeling stuck, start here
"I am so..... out of shape" she says. Our eyes meet, and I see her exhaustion. Her frustration, fear, and overwhelm. Every fiber of me wishes I could pause time and hear her story, and tell her how deeply I feel her pain, but I have 8 seconds left in this interval and need to return to the center of the room to demonstrate what's next.
This is the most painful part of the postpartum journey for many women I work with. Maybe you were a professional athlete, or a group fitness junkie, or a weekend warrior, or a runner, or a couch surfer prior to your pregnancy. The recovery process is unpredictable, and there are absolutely no shortcuts.
I want you to keep this in your heart- The best views of your life start at the bottom.
If I could sit with you during this moment, this is what I would share.
You have to trust the process.
Just like those final contractions, the only way is through.
Yes, there are magic pills now. Yes, there are adult diapers. Yes, you can fill and scalpel and compress your way through life. However, the shortcuts are merely band-aids, some with severe consequences.
The only way to truly get strong is to show up for yourself. Tired, mad, bored, annoyed, manic, it doesn't matter. Consistency is king.
According to Wolf's law, our bones regrow, from the inside out, every seven years or so in the direction they are being used in. Meaning, the workouts you do now are what you will be living in later. If you are skipping strength training, high impact exercise, and not getting proper nutrition, your body is at risk of developing diseases.
During this very unrelenting and gentle time of postpartum, (within six months after delivery), our bodies need to rest. We will feel soft and out of shape. Pushing too hard, too soon, can lead to disaster. I've heard so many horror stories from women whom their pelvis is still healing only exacerbate pain, injury, and frustration. So it's a long journey to "feel normal", and for many of us, much longer than we want.
I've had three babies of my own. Please do not mistake me for someone who has always been athletic. My personal journey to even setting foot in the gym started from my own injuries from weakness as a teenager. I have so much empathy for people who feel like their at rock bottom of their fitness, because I have been there many times myself.
So here is what I will share if you are feeling frustrated and out of shape.
Keep Going.
That's it. Maybe you start really slow. Walking 20 minutes four times per week. Or taking one class. Or one strength training session. Then add on after three weeks. That's it.
This can feel incredibly painful, especially after getting "cleared" to return to exercise. We need to take it very slow, and stay consistent. Skip anything that causes pain. Studies have shown that most runners get injured so often because they add miles on way too fast for their body to adapt. Slow and steady wins the game when it comes to postpartum.
Think of your body like a house. Your posture is your foundation. During pregnancy our posture shifts in order to accommodate our children. We need to correct faulty movement patterns first. Please visit MomTrainer.com/postpartum for exercises you can do at home during the fourth trimester. From there we build strength, speed, and power.
Prioritize Rest.
Really. High levels of stress can increase your heart rate, boost your cortisol (stress hormone), and make you more injury-prone. We can decrease stress through breathing exercises, sleep, regular exercise, and by eating lots of healthy foods. Cortisol can make you feel hungrier for sugar, as we need the extra energy if we're about to fight a tiger. If you aren't fighting a tiger, our bodies will store extra the calories. Even worse, if you are short on sleep, high levels of cortisol will interfere with your melatonin production, making sleep even harder.
So please, rest.
Eat.
We need good food. Particularly postpartum. I am not a registered dietitian, but my postpartum nutrition certification encourages me to tell everyone that we need higher levels of vitamins C and E. We need collagen sources from bone broth, hemp hearts, peanut butter, and organ meats. This is to heal any tearing. Soups, hearty casseroles with lentils, warm foods with lots of spices, and fresh vegetables can be a great addition while your body is recovering. Please seek out a licensed professional for a meal plan, but please, just eat. So many women I work with are starving themselves in attempts to get the remaining pounds off, but that's not how this works. We need more calories to heal and produce milk. I found myself completely busy with baby and not even realizing I hadn't eaten until 2pm most days. I wish I had asked for help, and prioritized my nutrition. My metabolism was completely shot after having two babies under two.
Now, back to the 8 seconds I had with my new student, I reminded her she's already got the gold star for just showing up to class. She smiled at me, and finished the whole thing like a boss. We chatted about her PT and how to incorporate those exercises. I gave her alternative options for the end-of-class core finisher, so she was able to participate and not make her diastasis worse. She absolutely crushed her workout, and I hope to see her again tomorrow.
I hope you take from this that feeling stuck doesn't mean you're a failure. It just means you need help. Like a toddler attempting to put on pants for the first time, it's messy, and you don't need to do it alone.
Please reach out if you need help. I have office hours on Thursdays and would love to hear from you. My book, The Complete Guide to Postpartum Fitness, is available in my shop and covers everything from prolapse to breastfeeding and includes a year of workouts designed for postpartum challenges.
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